Robots doing what robots do best/Race report #1

The movie certainly has it’s moments.

So Fluidride Cup #4 was at Port Angeles a couple weekends ago. We practiced on a tacky, perfect course. Saturday night, however, the skies were angry. By the time of our first run, the course was soggy in the fresh parts, and slippery as hell in the old parts.

ROBOFUNK won at PA. Several years, hundreds of dollars, and several closets full of TLD clothing were justified this past weekend. Forever, Pfunk will be considered a god among men.

I, on the other hand, qualified first by 3 seconds, and then decided to spice things up a bit. I figured that with a 3 second advantage, it would be too easy to just focus on riding faster than everyone else. So I decided to race my final run not with my vision, but with the force.

I didn’t have a standard Jedi issue blast shield available, so I made due with what I had:

The force sucked. I need much better Jedi training. I almost hit 5 trees dead on, and by the time I made it to Justice (the uber steep, exposed death rock chute) for this banger of a skinsuit photo, I was mostly riding by feel. Simultaneously the most frightened and pleasantly surprised I’ve ever been. Every time I didn’t hit something was nice.

I ended up with ninth after a big off the bike fall, about 11 seconds off first, with no vision. Considering that I’d never podiumed in $emi $low, even with a great run, I was excited to do that well. Even though I threw away an easy podium/win. Most importantly, I was ready to win at the next race. I also realized the advantage of a fender.

Your expert men’s champion:

Patrick Funk

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