Your Mont Sainte Anne FAAG World Cup rankings

Congratulations go out to Richie Rude Jr., your current leader in the Rocky Roads FAAG World Cup Series. Richie is the quietest, nicest kid in the world, so when asked about becoming the FAAG leader, Richie smirked, stared at his shoes and kicked circles in the dust.

Later he reportdely asked his Yeti teammates and team manager Damion Smith why Charlie said such mean things about him. Teammate Jared Graves informed him that when people are left alone or are not given attention as small children, they often lash out at others who are more successful than them, or try to mask their deficiencies and seek the attention of others with humor, often at the expense of others. Richie spent some time alone later that night on a long walk, and pondered why Charlie couldn’t have loving parents like his.

Here are your point totals in the series:

1. Richie Rude, 172 points
2. Luke Strobel, 153 points
3. Duncan Riffle, 85 points
4. Eliot Jackson, 69 points
5. Neko Mulally, 67 points

Luke is close behind Richie in points, and has historically done well at Mont Sainte Anne, with the long, physically-demanding course suiting his moto-inspired riding style. When reached for comment, Luke had this to say:

“Charlie didn’t post anything for, like, two months. Does anyone even read that site anymore?”

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