Gee Atherton has now raced:
-A car on Top Gear
-A motorcycle for some Red Bull stunt that no one watched
-And now, a peregrine falcon.
There was a time when we at TEAM ROBOT rooted for GEE, when he blew up doing backflip attempts in a half-lid in Eurohickistan, won Schladming while he was still going through puberty, and generally had a good time while riding like an idiot. Pretty rad. We like to call that Earthed 1-4.
Somewhere around 2007 two things happened: first, Gee realized he was a real athlete and needed to start acting like one, meaning dieting, huge squats, hating bike riding, and probably roids. Shortly thereafter came his second big discovery: he really wasn’t that good. Yeah, he’s one rainbow jersey and a World Cup title good, but definitely not top-level consistency resulting in total domination good.
And that would be fine for fun-loving, pinned-at-full-retard, young/happy Gee, but for roided-out need to win everything Gee the realization that he would train so hard and still lose 95% was too soul crushing.
So where does Gee go from there?
If you can’t win races against real mountain bikers, you just have to race birds and tv show car drivers. It’s a sad, small, scary little depressing world in Gee’s head.