Jean Gerard

For the last two seasons I’ve had people ask me at downhill races “wait, you still race downhill? I thought you were full time enduro guy.” 
I ride for Felt, I race a lot of enduros, I’m past my prime and borderline irrelevant in downhill racing, so yes, on paper I should be “enduro guy.” And I would be good at it too, if it weren’t for this one guy who keeps showing up and winning everything in sight:

Luke Strobel. He’s definitely not “enduro guy,” he’s still on flat pedals, and I don’t think he pedals most of the time because he’s lazy, but he keeps winning everything and making me look like shit. And if that wasn’t bad enough, on Monday morning after the race, he texts me crap like this:

“Dude, you should put this up on TEAM ROBOT. So good.”

You know in Talledega Nights when Ricky Bobby keeps getting beat by Jean Gerard, and Jean is sipping macchiato while driving and he spends his days on his ranch grooming his collection of gay horses with his husband while painting. It’s like that.

Getting beat at every race by is bad enough, but when they start texting you youtube videos of sock puppets playing Weird Al versions of bad metal songs, it’s too much for a ROBOT to take.

21 thoughts on “Jean Gerard

  1. Strobel needs an unexpected urine splash “speed bump” in the middle of his run. Lol. That'll take the wind out of his sails.

    BTW- The winner of the Tour de France this year got doused with urine, and he still won. So- There's a lesson to be learned in that too.

    Many articles about it on YouTube

  2. Will anybody explain to me what's so many World Cup pros keep their tire pressures secret? In that Dirt mag gwin bike check Steve Jones asks Gwins mechanic about tire pressure and he says “I'm not giving secrets here”. Also when asked about his forks damping he says “our settings are where everyone elses are”. The fork I suppose makes a little sense, but tire pressure? Really?

  3. To be fair, anything related to regional enduros is irrelevant. Regional downhills at least capture the attention of tens of dozens of people.

  4. Dear Senor Robot:

    Please amend your “status” as someone who is somewhat fast.
    Seems to me you are only somewhat fast in the PNW, and you suck a big one when racing more than 500 miles from home.

    Strobel, on the other hand, is fast in other zip codes as well.

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